Excerpts from my Journal Vol.3
My name is Thomas Robert Dreyer. I was born in 1994. You should date me.
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Whining mixed with genuine problems: Volume 2
Excerpts from my journal I kept this school year.
A lot of this shit I feel really ashamed of writing, like I should’ve just sucked it up and dealt with it like I’ve learned to fairly well recently. Some of this shit is really whiny bullshit, but it was nice to have an outlet when I found myself in some of the worst ruts I’ve had so far.
Whining mixed with genuine problems:Volume 1
Nothing beats a pocket before finals.
Cucumbers with some Hummus and ground mustard+ Some grapes.
It is a good morning.
things
1. A drawing I did. It helped me get out of a little rut.
2. My Coffee/Tea collecton. Hawaiian Hazlenut is the work of thee gods.
3. A perfectly intact cinnamon roll that was just sitting on one of the school’s bathroom floors. It was fine to eat as it was in it’s wrapping, but I left it be.
4. Steak and Shake’s all you can eat pancakes for four dollars. What we need to do is get everyone and have them each acquire 4 dollars(so I don’t have to fucking pay), and then go and get unlimited pancakes. Good Glorious Amazing Downright Genius idea.
art
Why did I spend alot of today worrying about what that guy who walked up and took a piss in the urinal next to me thought when I couldn’t go because I was too nervous?
But no, today was pretty good, at least that’s how it ended.
I was shifting between highs and lows like a mawfucker, it’s weird because this usually happens every other day, not every other hour.
Whatever, I feel good now, and I’m going to bed.
Oh yeah, something that happened that made me happy: I was driving home, and these 2 guys I work with pulled up next to me and shot me a joking, overenthusiastic angry look, and I did the same. It reminded me for an instant of these retarded little films I imagine myself in when I daydream. A scene with low key 70’s music akin to the soundtrack of Dazed and Confused, where me and a bunch of friends are tired and miserable from a long day of work, but are confident and hopeful about what’s on the horizon. This scene would be near the end of the movie, and would serve to uplift an otherwise sad film displaying the trap of minimum wage and the need to get out of it.
[Flash 10 is required to watch video]
Today has been a trip.
Every once in awhile, I ask myself this question to entertain a hope of coming to a grand realization about my existence, but it just bounces around in my head and doesn’t sink in: “How is any of this even real?”
You know, how can any of this exist? People with entire lives of experience, thoughts, and memories all from a point of view you could never comprehend seeing the world from. Countries with cultures varying far beyond what you’re used to. Terrible, terrible people, the occasional brilliant mind that paints the human experience, and even the average man.
Just how?
I feel like it can’t for some reason, that a world like ours is meant to never exist in the cosmos, and the sheer fact that it does is grounds for it caving in on itself. Today I was running on two nights of an hour or two of sleep, and that question came close to making sense. Nothing felt real. Very, very surreal.
4 weeks ago - 
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